Bold: The characters are speaking in English.
P’Pun stared at the photos on the screen of my MacBook with a dumbfounded expression. Dark brown eyes beneath his glasses looked over at my face several times.
“Confess, puppy… who edited these photos for you?”
“I really did it myself!” I lift up two fingers like a boyscout to pledge that I wasn’t lying. “So is it good or not, senior?”
“It’s a damned ambush Petch.” P’Pun didn’t answer my question. Instead, he grabbed the stylus, sliding it around to alternate between each photo, impressed. “I hold back slightly and you’ve already rushed past me by several levels. With skills like these, I don’t think you need to borrow my new lens anymore.”
“You’re joking.” I sat squished on the same sofa, leaving P’Pun to pat my head and rub my tail. I felt very proud of myself.
“You don’t look very happy that I’m complimenting you though. Shouldn’t your tail be wagging side to side and jumping up and about by now?” P’Pun adjusts his glasses. I noticed the area under his eyes looked equally as fatigued as mine. “What’s wrong? Coming to me with drooping ears and a tucked tail, did P’Chid scold you on the phone this morning?”
“No.” I replied, mumbling. I was gearing up to explain but managed to hold myself back–P’Pun didn’t have a clue about me and that hottie after all. “I slept at four last night, so I’m a bit tired.”
“Then feel free to take a nap here.” The owner of the two-story house on Prasarnmit street offered in his usual warm caring tone. I immediately collapse down on P’Pun’s bed after he got up to his feet. “Don’t pass out yet though, I’ll be back, give me a minute.”
“Eating before bed is going to make me fat.” I murmur, feeling extremely drowsy. Curiously, whenever I visited P’Pun’s house, my eyes never stayed open for long. “It’s your fault that I got scolded.”
The owner of the room stilled. “Hm? What did you say?”
“Nothing, I was sleep-talking.”
Irritated, P’Pun walks back to pinch my nose hard, making me cry out loud; chasing away all traces drowsiness. “What did P’Chid call you about? Start confessing like a good puppy Petch.”
“He… ow, it hurts, let go first… he called me to say… don’t twist, don’t twist, it hurtsssssss…”
Tell P’Pun what? That a golden retriever was flirting with me!?
“P’Chid told me: Next time you’re working, don’t bring another man along, even he can get jealous too.”
My senior flinched visibly. I saw his reaction and felt somewhat guilty. When it comes to trusting people easily, P’Pun was second to none. His smooth white face was pale as a sheet of paper. Seeing this, the devil hiding inside my head became restless. My hands were itching to pounce on the innocent prey in front me.
“You’re joking, Petch.”
Well I am joking. P’Pun, why do you trust me so easilyyy… at this rate, you’re asking to be teased!
“P’Chid… is very serious P’Pun. I… umm… it’s better if you don’t bring that foreigner along with you next time. Think of it as being considerate of P’Chid’s feelings okay?”
I recall vaguely that lying was a breach of the five precepts, however I wasn’t Buddhist, therefore this didn’t count as sinning.
“Yeah, it’s not as if Sasha and I are ‘together’. I guarantee it won’t happen a second time.”
“I didn’t realise that you cared so much for me and Editor Chid, I feel so touched.” I said cheesily, it was vomit-inducing.
P’Pun side-eyed me. “I guess so.”
I swallow my saliva twice. P’Pun really believed me, wow! If Editor Chid finds out that I used his name for such a tale, my neck was definitely getting slit. But killing two birds with one stone like this was way too worth it… Even though I felt a bit guilty, I couldn’t help holding back a smile.
“Oh Petch… you’re done applying for an Uzbekistan visa right?”
I nod. “And how about you, senior?”
Eh? …Something’s off. P’Pun was in a good mood earlier, so why did he seem oddly listless all of sudden? What was my senior thinking about? Scratching his ear here, scratching his head there, he seemed inexplicably worried. Or were P’Pun and P’Chid experiencing a hurdle in their relationship? With Sasha appearing out of thin air, has the situation transformed into a tragic love triangle? Hu… let me get my popcorn first.
“Changing the topic as soon as I tease you about P’Chid, P’Pun are you having a secret affair with P’Chid?”
“You prick.” P’Pun cussed blatantly. My, my, I wanted to poke my nose into other people’s business more, but… lets not. Having P’Pun as my personal sugar daddy was good enough, it won’t be pretty if another mistress (P’Chid???) gets involved.
“Oh… by the way, when are you heading back? I’ll send you off by car.” Changing the topic again. Forget it, P’Pun was already someone with a short fuse, delving further would risk me getting hit by the back of his hand.
“I drove here myself today.”
“Hua, is that so?” Look at him make that disappointed face, my intuition was definitely not wrong.
“If you want to see Sasha that badly, just call him. There’s no need to beat around the bush by driving me back, senior.”
In front of me, the innocent spectacled man’s ears turned red. Dammit, I really love P’Pun. If you’re going to be this cute, I’ll offer you to the golden retriever on a plate right this instant!
“Hush, Petch. If this reaches P’Chid’s ears, I won’t let you off.”
I slap my knee. Saying this meant there was really something going on between the two of them, wahaha! The evil plan in my head was beginning to come together piece by piece. I’ll definitely be free from the golden retriever this time!
P’Pun, on the other hand, had no idea that he was falling into the trap of a mischievous little monkey like me. He was sitting in front of his MacBook, moving his mouse here and there to check my work.
“For real though Petch, don’t lie to me, who edited these photos for you?”
P’Pun smacked my head so hard that it dipped forward. “You can’t even tell me this much?”
He tried to wring an answer out of me but I was far too shy to tell P’Pun about me and that drop-dead handsome mafioso; my mouth was heavy as if weighed down by rocks. Importantly, I was starting to wonder about what exactly the other man wanted from me? One second he’s fierce and menacing, another second he’s gentle to the point where my heart trembled.
A large hand, white and smooth like a cooked chicken offering grabbed my head, shaking it around playfully. A faint smile surfaced on P’Pun’s face.
I had no idea what that smile meant, the only thing I heard however was: “Sleep, your eyes are swollen from work. I’ll go buy you something delicious to eat.”
Huu, somebody get this ‘Gentleman of the Year’ out here.
Opening the door to the room, he halted his steps, turning back to send a sparkly aura my way.
“Oh, do you want some milk to cope with your hunger for now little monkey?”
“Is it school milk?” I made a clueless expression. “I don’t want spoiled milk.”
“Milk from a pair of breasts maybe.”
“Anything but milk from your breasts senior, I want it from the breasts of a pretty girl instead.”
A carton of milk hit its mark at the center of my forehead, smacking me upside the head and causing me to tumble off the bed…
Oh P’Pun… you really are innocent on the outside and ruthless on the inside. You even have the heart to hurt your own junior… I grumble inwardly while gingerly soothing my forehead. Look, there’s a bump now…
As for mentioning that he was a gentleman earlier, I take it back!
Allow me to show off a bit. Editor Chid was in utter shock for a total of thirty seconds with my god-tier retouching work and asked the same question as P’Pun (you guys know each other so well) about who took over for me. When told that it was my own doing, P’Chid stubbornly argued back, refusing to believe me.
“Where did you go to upgrade yourself?” He asked, eyes cautious.
“On Pantip probably! I just heaved my brain over to ask for a CPU and RAM upgrade, simple as that.” If you won’t believe me, I’ll answer with sarcasm.
(TN: Pantip – A Thai internet forum)
“Then you probably changed your brain from a Pentium II and 46MB RAM to a Core 2 Duo and 4GB RAM it seems.”
I was totally being looked down on… Seeing me frown, P’Chid hurriedly patted my head in comfort. Wasn’t this like slapping me then rubbing my back? Don’t even try to comfort me, I’m sulking!
P’Chid paid no mind, quickly beckoning Meuk–our expert photo editor–over to relay the rest of the work to her. Turning back again, I was still sulking so he sat down beside me. “Where’s Pun? Did he not come with you?”
“Why don’t you go call him yourself, P’Chid.” I said annoyingly. “Since you know each other so well.”
“I called but he didn’t pick up, so I thought you guys were together.” P’Chid got up to brew some coffee and asked whether I wanted some. For a hardcore editor like him, this was the extent of the kindness that he could muster in order to appease his juniors. “Want a cup, puppy?”
The smell of good quality coffee wafted up to touch my nose. I was still sulking, therefore I stared at him and refused to answer his question. “Did P’Pun hand in his work yet?”
“He sent it in several days ago actually, every photo was beautiful so there was no need for any touch-ups. That foreigner looks explosively handsome in those photos though, his bright aura turned all the girls in the office frail.” P’Chid was preoccupied with brewing coffee, not bothering to look at my face. “That said… he’s been travelling back and forth with Pun hasn’t he?”
I listen attentively. “You’re kidding me.”
“Didn’t hear the latest news I see, your daddy Pun has kicked you to the curb already.” P’Chid cackled, handing the coffee to me in a pristine white ceramic mug. The fragrant smell of brewed coffee wafted in the air. I received it, took a sip… the coffee was delicious, then glanced at P’Chid.
“So are you talking for real about P’Pun?”
“Oh come on, why would I lie, Pun is just feigning cluelessness… Mild was the one responsible for blowing his cover by inviting that foreigner inside the office. She assumed that he was one of the models we arranged a meeting with.” P’Chid stood leaning against the workdesk, casually stirring his coffee with a spoon. “It was only yesterday. When that guy came inside, your daddy…”
“Wait, wait.” I interrupted before the misunderstanding got out of hand. “P’Chid, P’Pun isn’t my husband!”
“Even if he’s not, he’s almost like one already Petch.”
How about I smack your forehead with my feet!
After that, when P’Pun saw Sasha walk into the office he started faltering, face red, ears red, stumbling over his words. To make matters worse, Meuk was just in the middle of looking through P’Pun’s photos. Putting two and two together, she realised that the deific foreigner in the photos and the foreigner sitting in the flesh without a care on the guest sofa was the exact same person. My poor P’Pun was therefore stuck in a difficult situation. With Sasha shooting him a deadly smile, it was like P’Pun’s brain malfunctioned, he was unable to work. Displeased, my senior in the end had to drag the other man outside to sort out their issue. But when the foreigner dropped sweet cajoling words on him relentlessly, Punnaphob lost his balance entirely.
“Hu, P’Chid how did you come across these juicy details?”
“Well Mild’s the one who wrote it up on her blog. There’s more to it too.” P’Chid smiled. “Are you curious?”
I pretend to sigh. “Who would want to hear the story of their own husband with a new man?”
“Waai! So it really is a tragic love triangle!” Mild exclaimed loudly. I flinch, meeting Mild stood hugging a folder up against her bulging chest and holding the door open. Everyone in the office turned their heads to look solely at me.
P’Chid laughed till tears formed in his eyes.
As for me… I was so embarrassed that I might as well go home crying to P’Pun. At this stage… if I claimed to be pregnant with P’Pun’s baby, everyone in this office would likely believe me.
P.s. Before heading back, I turned on the office computer to read Mild’s blog… I was shocked and had to read it again twice.
P.p.s. I found out that P’Chid was lying because he was there to witness everything unfold, including the first P.s.!
P.p.p.s. No wonder why P’Pun seemed awfully restless when I teased him about P’Chid being jealous this morning. Are you guys hiding a secret from me… hmm?
Kindaichi Phachara must solve this case, his grandfather’s name is riding on it!
(TN: Reference to detective manga ‘The Kindaichi Case Files’)
I thought about P’Pun the entire time while driving from the office to the bank, to the mall, to the currency exchange store, and so forth. I managed to conclude that my husband P’Pun was really feigning cluelessness. What dung beetle? That mark was clearly an allergic reaction to foreigners (But in that moment he looked truly clueless–this detail had me stumped).
I ring the doorbell of room 1202 and sigh.
Hu, one person was a gentleman with a hidden streak…
As for this conceited young master… he was menacing to the point where I wanted him as a guard dog.
To compare their ferociousness… Between a Rottweiler and Alexander Nazarbayev, I was beginning to feel unsure of which was scarier.
“Why are you here again.”
The tone was frigid and coupled with a deadly gaze. I wanted to take on the role of a tragic heroine with tears rolling down her face like in those romantic dramas but I didn’t have the heart to do so, that hottie wasn’t a stupid male love interest. The more realistic outcome would be getting kicked out of the room.
“I’m here to collect my belongings.”
Saying this out loud made me realize: Did this hottie think I was moving bases to room 1206? How do I fix this misunderstanding? “Um… last night I washed my underwear and left it to dry here… um… so I came take it back.”
The beautiful pair of eyebrows furrowed together and he heaved a sigh. “You didn’t take a bath last night though?”
Every murder case has its evidence. As for Petch the filthy monkey, what attested to his guilt was an unseemly smell!
Alexey shrugged but agreed to open the door and let me inside. His eyes seemed to be pondering something however his mouth stayed shut.
I slip through the door which was ajar just enough for the size of my body. Once the door shut, I felt like I was chased into a corner by his piercing stare. Alexey observed me from head to toe and shifted his sight to stop at the MacBook in my arms. “Did you send in your work yet?”
“I sent it in already.”
“My editor was very pleased…” I inhale fully into my lungs, raise my face to meet those pair of eyes, and pursed my lips tight before continuing to speak. “No one believed that it was my own work–uhh… uhh..”
Say thank you, say it! Just tell him Petch!
“Well it does beckon suspicion.” The hottie interjected, expression still as cold as ever.
There it goes, my mood to reconcile with him!
“So I replied, Petchy Potter had a creative block and fell asleep, but Dobby the house-elf helped finish up the rest of his work. After waking up, Harry–I mean Petchy Potter hastily went to deliver his work before a certain person called into his phone…”
They say you will end up in hell if you lie. Hopefully heaven is sympathetic enough to prevent P’Chid from finding out that I’ve used him in another excuse again, amen!
“A good morning call.” The hottie finishes my sentence, glaring at me as if wanting to eat my flesh and blood. It was in this second which I realized, this hottie had horribly misunderstood. This character belonging J.K. Rowling, are we talking about the same one? Moreover, he shouldn’t be of Uzbekistan nationality! I open my mouth to correct myself but it was too late. “Not long after that… Dumbledore with his fabulous beard called him and said, ‘Goodmorning my dear Petchy, did you sleep well last night?’ …That guy has twin sons in Frankfurt, they’re four and a half years old, would you like to help produce more heirs Petchy Potter?”
I almost fell off my chair. “Hah? Four and a half years old!?”
“A man in his mid-thirties having two children, there’s nothing weird about it.”
Mid-thirties. Two children.
(The number of wives weren’t revealed, and how about the bed partners!!!)
And… and… and what about making P’Pun blush up to his ears, travelling back and forth together, not to mention chasing after me as well, how do you explain this?
Beneath his golden hair, blue eyes, and bright face was too pitch black for me to want to explore. It was better to not trust that golden retriever.
The hottie looks at my face… his expression blank… so blank that I feared for my heart.
“So why are you here?” He asks, pulling me back into this topic unprepared. I noticed now that this hottie looked oddly relaxed today. He wasn’t wearing a suit, wasn’t wearing a necktie, actually… with that appearance didn’t he just get out of bed! How does the Kazakhstan embassy operate if the ambassador’s consultant wakes up at four in the afternoon?
Alexey raises his eyebrows high.
“Um… I brought a sock to thank you Mr. Dobby for saving my life.” Those pair of grey eyes had a glint of intrigue. I say in a soft voice: “Thank you.” Albeit it was more like a whisper to myself.
Alexey laughed ‘hu hu’…
“Sorry Potter, but one sock isn’t enough.”
I flinch, face frowning. “I can take off the one on my other feet too, if you want.” I know we were playing around, but what did he need the other side of my sock for? A sock that I’ve been wearing entire day, far too smelly and sour to bear, let me have a sniff to make sure…
Why was he speaking so closely, whispering next to my ear…?
Could his nose not pick up scent or what, playfully brushing it near my ear…
And… that mouth… was he going to kiss me or not… teasing and tempting… causing my heart to falter.
The drop-dead handsome man in front me stared with a glint in his eyes, as if about to devour me whole. I was sucked back into the real world where the Russian version of Dobby was way more ferocious than the children’s fiction version.
Alexander Nazarbayev pulled something out of his back pocket. I glance over and flinched. Hey! That was my E-ticket!
“Where did you get that from?”
“The messenger from K Line delivered it.” Do not misunderstand, K Line isn’t some gay hotline, but a Japanese agency whose services I regularly used to buy my airplane tickets from. If you can’t think, ask K Line, call 02XXXXX68–Hey! That airplane ticket is mineeee…
“And why is it with you?”
Alexey sneered. Being this handsome and sinister turned entire concept of Dobby upside-down.
“How about it Potter? …Now what are going to compensate me with?”
I swallow my saliva stiffly… If I danced the ‘Grilled Chicken Dance’ as compensation, I wonder if this hottie was going to tear my airplane ticket into pieces?
(TN: Grilled Chicken Dance – A popular silly dance based off of a children’s song, here is a demonstration)
“With… with…” My wretched face flared with heat as I thought of obscene things… don’t… can you not move away from me a bit? I can’t breathe… I was lost entirely to those stunning eyes.
“I’ll give you three seconds.”
Three seconds ended in what felt like lie.
“I don’t know…” I admit, voice pleading sympathy. “Whatever you want, just take it.”
“The time for playing games is up.” The frigid voice and deadly piercing gaze returned to his face. The hottie yanked the airplane ticket, separating it into two… ‘kwaek~’.
If I was J.K. Rowling…
I would trash the original Harry Potter and write a dark version instead… make Voldemort into the protagonist and Dobby the little house-elf into a scoundrel. What’s the use for feel-good literature when the real world is several times more cruel?
I went weak-kneed, slumping down on the floor and eyes brimming with tears. The airplane ticket was torn in half, anger made my entire body numb. Alexey made an annoying sneer. The vein on my forehead twitched uncontrollably… I must not punch him…
“I really want to know… how you managed to survive this far when you can’t even handle your own matters. All you do is make a fuss, waiting for other people to do ‘this’ and ‘that’ for you…”
I must not punch him…
“As for yesterday, I wasn’t angry at anything but rather annoyed at the sight of you… it was also a bit pitiful.”
I must not punch him…
“Only losers dream of being a professional despite never thinking to make an effort with their own ability… remember these words well.”
The sound of a punch cut through the air with a loud whiz. My fist made contact with the left side of his face. However, Alexey merely stared at me with amused eyes, as if the punch which I swung at him didn’t irritate his skin in the least…
“Oh, another thing, the fact that we ‘make love’ doesn’t mean that I’m obligated to do anything for you, understand this too.”
I was doubly shocked at what I was hearing. Yet it seems that my surprise was according to Alexey’s plans–he who did not care, was not interested and… saw me as worthless.
“I’m not like Sasha who would gladly offer up all sorts of things to others–especially to people with bad personalities, doing nothing but take, doing nothing but ask, a lazy bum like you. Don’t even hope to gain anything from me… I’ve told you before so let me refresh your memory again, with that personality of yours, you need to be taught a lesson. Remember this and stuff it in that thick skull of yours!”
His thumb swiped carelessly at the blood seeping slightly from the edge of his mouth. Stunning grey eyes flashed but his lips were stretched in a sneer, as if satisfied that I fell for his game… I stared at those pair of eyes with anger… Seeing him not bother to evade my attack made me shake even harder with pent up rage. Yet, his words stabbed my heart in all the right places, I couldn’t object.
Last night I asked myself: What was I to the other man…
A bed partner?
…Before this, yes. But now….. I was nothing but a loser!
Alexey, you’re so goddamned mean T_T. There’s a reason for his actions I assure you, but you’ll have to stick around for the next chapter (It’s lengthy again, see you in a week+)